Me–NaKed

I don’t know yet if i’ll write my posts in English or Spanish…i started in english because that’s what i was used to…also because Edo, cloudy, perhana and others used to read it. I don’t know. I’d seriously like to write this in spanish…perhaps i’ll post a translation later on.
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Aunque el español es mi lengua materna, he llegado a sentirme muy a gusto con el inglés. Podría decir que es mi segunda lengua materna…En fin. Regresé
¿Porqué escribo en este blog viejo que tanto tiempo hice a un lado?
Pues, en principio por que estaba harta de él, harta de lo que sentía y éste representaba. Aún así sigo siendo la misma persona, (físicamente al menos) he crecido y cambiado muchas cosas….pero otras tantas siguen igual.
Algo nuevo, integrado ahora a mi y heredado por Irving, es darle un significado a las cosas.
Entonces, escribir aquí si tiene un significado especial…y es ese. Soy la misma persona, me gusta el nombre del blog y me gusta el layout.

Probablemente lo cambie, pero quiero copiar las entries a mi antigüo diario…y si algún dia quiero escribir algo privado; entonces lo escribiré alla.

Por ahora es todo creo. He regresado. Talvez escriba aquí más seguido. Quisiera hacerlo, es un mal hábito que quiero retomar

LOL. how funky. I posted that so long ago…and I talked about Irving…who would have tought 4 months later we started going out. Perhana, if you’re reading this… HI!! I hope you and your girl are doing fine Cloudy, hullo too! See you on msn.

I’ve been feeling so emo lately that I really don’t do any of my projects. I don’t draw nor write. I moved out and back to my house in less than three months. With my mom. I was so fucking dissapointed to come back. She let me down, for the first time ever and I don’t know how to react. Sometimes I feel so angry…meh. I soud like a teenager T_T –but whatever. I write cuz it’s my way of venting and letting it out.

I decided to write today because, I’ve been thinking for a while that I want to start writing again. The last short story I wrote was over a year ago…A YEAR AGO. I don’t know, maybe if i start writing at least ordinary blog updates, one day i’ll feel inspired to do something else….hopefully that’ll happen. I just want to get into fucking university to be a student again and have a more normal life, busy and productive. Although I feel somewhat more productive now (i’m working as an ESL teacher for 2nd grade kids) I still don’t feel like I’ve got it all figured out. I’m very stressed about all this university buissness. I just want it to end.

At least, i have some emotional support, not from my mom like it’s always been,

 continues here v  

…nor friends…but from irving. I don’t know how he can tolerate all my shit and crying. I think he really loves me. I don’t know why he does. Anyway. Today’s point and the reason I wrote all this: I FUCKING HATE TO BE SO FUCKING INSECURE! I FUCKING HATE TO SOUND LIKE AN ANSTY EMO TEENAGER! AND MORE OVER I HATE TO FEEL JELOUS.

Okay here’s the thing. It’s so stupid i can’t believe i’m actually saying this. Ok, this random Lily girl added me. I add her on myspace. I have no idea where she came out from. Days later i figure she left a note on irving’s space. I read their comments. Irving told her that “she made her day” because she liked one of his drawings. He made her a portrait. Then i feel all insecure and emo. WTF. seriously. I’m almost sure he doesn’t even know her real life, and it’s probably another online friend like the ones i have. So what’s the big fucking deal? I DON’T KNOW! I don’t know why i feel like this. Well yeah, i do know…cuz i’m insecure. Love hurts. fuck. this isn’t love this is emotional dependancy. I hate this. I don’t like the girl, i think she’s just one of those girls who want to get all the attention. Anyway. *sigh* when did I become like this? ….I WASN’T like this.

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While re-reading the post, I remembered that I do, sometimes get ideas to write about…yet I never write them down. I should. I don’t know why I don’t write…The only thing I feel happy about is irving now. I think we have a good relationship…maybe that’s why I feel so afraid of loosing him…and makes me depend on him. Which is compleately stupid, because he’s always telling me he loves me and shows it too…and i believe him, but i don’t know why it feels like this. Perhaps, i’m too egocentric and I want all the attention too…

Now, on a second thought, or rather a third thought….he recently felt the same about seguro and his papi chulo buissness. Uhm. Nah. I’m just trying to feel less guilty by giving the excuse he feels like that too. If he feels that it should be none of my buissness and viceversa. Or should it be? I’m confused. Maybe…i feel like he doesn’t love me as much as i do….maybe it’s true maybe it’s all a silly scary fantasy…but it could be true because, at some point i did felt he loved me much more that I did…but it was at the beggining and i was seriously (lol) damaged from the past relationship and i told him about it and he said it was okay. I don’t know. My heart isn’t beating as fast as it did when i noticed all this lily stuff nor i feel that emo. To end with this post, i’ll repeat my words. Anyway. *sigh* when did I become like this? ….I WASN’T like this.

….or was i?

I’m so gay, updating my blog again haha.

No one reads and i don’t care. Well, hi cloudy probably you’ll see this some time. Well, I feel proud. HA. Well, not, but it’s funny and i wanted to tell someone but no one paid me attention on msn. Fuck them. I’m playing runescape, it’s a good game. Anyway GUA is down and i was reading a blog and I thought of this thing..I’m done with Rudy, or he was done with me? w/e, we’re not having secks anymore never ever again. That was said like, last month. On our “anniversary” ha, exactly one year after we kissed for the first time. What a geek am i. I remember the day we met and the day we kissed for the same time <3. Fucking bastard. He IS important to me. Oh well, I haven’t seen him since then. I just called him once to ask him a favour, but after all I didn’t tell him to do it. Yeah, I don’t know how to deal with him anymore. I don’t want to call him because I don’t want to be annoying him or whatever…bleh. Screw him and screw his wabawaljdjef.sa. pfffffffffft.

Anyway. I need to brag about TWO things. First, the story behind this updating blogness thing. Ha. I went drinking saturday. AHAHAH. Big deal hu? NOT! Well, yeah and it was fun. I went out with Marilu and with his b/f (alex) and with his friend (todd) and a third guy called Julio. It was weird. Tannia wants to be with Todd, but i kinda want to also, but Todd doesn’t want to date Tannia and I don’t want to date Julio who wants to date me. Ha. He told me I was cute and kissed me…and i was like uuuuh. yeah, i need …to…go…to…the…bathroom!

weird. I also found gorki at the “VIP zone” haha, stupid place, it sucks like all the bar. I hate rincon de maria, but oh well. Freaking vodka, makes me drunk very fast :s Yeah, but i was talking about Gorki. He was with his g/f and it’s going to be their bday soon. They’re cool, we talked a bit about random non-sense. We called Ion and Carliux but they didn’t answer their phone :C The wtf part of the night was the “dancer” girl. She “performed a dance” but all she did was move like a worm with salt. haha, i’m evil. ahaha. I’m laughing at my own jokes ;C that can’t be good. Ahaha, anyway…she just had a short hawaiian skirt and coconuts on her breasts. After that she changed and used short briefs and a bra. She took off the bra….but she never showed her boobs. That was the super strip-tease. ¬_¬ Gorki’s g/f and i were like ogm. It was the bday of a dude i didn’t knew, that’s why that happened…but anyway, it wasn’t good. I kept drinking and i went semi-uncounscious. I kinda fell asleep in Todd’s shoulder. He later on did too. It was like 5 am and we had to go back, but no one was undrunk enough to drive…until we found Julio again. He drove us home. While at the car, I started feeling better but Todd got worse. He was kinda trying to make out or something, but was too drunk to try. I found it funky….well, to be honest pathethic.

Anyway, I just did this test http://www.deathboy.co.uk/test/ you reader, should try it. It’s the background music for this entry. Aye. Whut else. Oh yeah, i’m applying to CCC one of the two best cinematography schools in Mexico and Latin America. YEAH. Tomorrow they’ll tell me if i’ve passed to the fourth and last stage of the admission process. Sweet hu?

I talked to the emo kid i once kissed, uh…irving. yeah. I’d date him still. garr… I really want to date someone again. Maybe not so seriously like with Edo or Cilf, but iono. Okay, that’s enough of bullshit for today. kekekeke. loggin offffffffffff

well, today was a great day despite I didn’t had much fun. I woke up early to talk to a guy on the university. I got a scholarship and i’m getting 50% off. yay! Altho, the career I wanted to take, “languages” isn’t available this semester, only  ”communications” oh well…better than nothing I guess. So, hooray for that. Also, I recieved a phone call that made me very very happy. It was Silfried my first boyfriend and I really love him alot. It was totally unexpected and I didn’t recognize his voice at first….it’s been years since the last time we saw eachother…but yeah. That was cool.

On other less important things…

my dad bought me lotta clothes! YAY! I got 3 jeans, 2 shirts and 3 sweaters…and a package of 3 g-stings I kinda didn’t want to wear those stuff, but i just can’t use my regular underwear with the new jeans…it looks bad. So, I kinda got used to them now. First day was awful :p

OOOH Tangas…togas..which reminds me of Diego’s b-day party. It was last week of school…I came into the cafe, and I saw Diego with his friend Mario. I was like OGM!! DIEGOOOOO!!! ^___^ KEKEKE! We talked a bit and he told me his party was Saturday night and that it would be a theme party. Everyone should go dressed like a hippie.

So, I went…When I arrived I think only two people looked just a bit hippie. I felt so innapropiate, lol. Anywayz, Diego was happy cuz I did go dressed like he asked me to. Anywayz, I was smart and I kept some jeans under what I was wearing. 

At first it was weird, because Mar was very very drunk and I didn’t knew anyone, except Sergio, Diego and Mario but they were iono, just doing stuff around. So I started drinking, I had the car, but obviously i didn’t want to get drunk…but I did. I didn’t noticed when it happened!! But when I was drunk I just started laughing more and talking more to others..there was this cute kid called Ian, I think. I wanted to kiss him so bad…but i’m glad i didn’t. I had lotta fun, but unfortunatelly when I went to the bathroom, the zipper of my pants broke. OGM! and I wasn’t wearing underwear.HAHA So, I went all worried with Diego and explained to him the shameful accident. He told me to go to his room and find something…but problem is, he’s way skinnier than me… I went upstairs but I found some jeans that fitted oh-so-perfectly. I told Diego that I had them, but he said those weren’t his…kek. So I had to ask the owner if I could borrow them…He found it extremely funny and accepted. I still have them, I should give them back, but i’ve been a bit lazy.

Also, I noticed it was late and that I had to drive and…when I was on Diego’s room, Mario was there but I saw a bottle of Jack Daniel’s…and I was like woaaa @_@  he told me to take a sip and then he insisted…(not like i was hard to convince) after that, everything went worse, because before that I was already trying to get sober…but after that, I just couldn’t. It was impossible. I puked, but short after there was nothing to puke…I tried to drink water but it wasn’t working. They tried to give me food but I felt like if i ate anything I’d puke. After that, I also couldn’t stand up very well… It was weird. So I just layed on the floor. lol. All I remember is Mar and her friends saying “aww, look at her, she looks so cute drunk!” and “aww! She looks like a little angel, but a drunk angel! jajajaja!” I was just like this ¬_¬’ Jesus.

While lying on the floor, I heard a guy saying “hey, ftw with this party, i look like a hippie, i’m too drunk, a girl i don’t even know is wearing my clothes, she’s passed out, puking and bleeding to death!! ” So, I quickly stood up and said something, apparently funny and fell down again. They told me it was the funniest thing they saw on a drunk person. I can’t even remember what i said, or exactly what did he say…but oh well. AFter a while, my dad called me and I got scared and that kinda helped me to sober up. KEKE. I drove home, but I was fine by then. Besides, it was very very close to where I was.

The day before that, was interesting too. It was a gig Gerardo invited me, so a huichol could get money and buy a camera to tape ceremonies on the dessert… My mom and I got kinda drunk there and it was fun.

That happened on a place called “El Manojo” and I got a job there. Well, they trained me for two days so I would learn how to do stuff. I can work on weekends there now. It’s fun. Uhm, what else. I don’t know. I’m tired of writing. I haven’t been on alot on MSN or GUA or anything.

Oh yeah, Christmas wasn’t bad but it wasn’t that good. It wasn’t as pathetic as I remember them, but it wasn’t great. At least they didn’t eat like pigs. I had to eat the same thing like 5 times in a row and I got kinda sick…I also got a flue, but i’m okay now. Uhm. Oh, I also have a band called Prozac, with Jefté…but we hadn’t rehearsed since two weeks ago. Either they kicked me out, or I don’t know what’s up. He invited me out the other day but he went out with his gf.

It sucks, because when I started to like him, he had just broken up with his g/f…and it was the time I was trying to break up with Fer….but I wanted to give him time to forget her and that, but argh. I was too slow, he’s dating her again…which sucks…but oh well. I hope they break up again soon Naw. I think he’s not the guy for me.Iono. At first I got super emo about him, now I care less. Aye.

I’m done with this montly update. Until next year.

So, I talked about him last post…but I don’t remember if I wrote everything that happened. I kinda screwed up cuz I got confused. The day after the movies he said that he wanted to get to know me before dating…but then he asked me out. I said I wasn’t so sure…then he asked me over and over if “our thing” was for serious. I said “yeah, why not” everytime, because I had told him already that I was his g/f right, and saying no would be like breaking up, right?

Oh, for fuck’s sake…

The first day we went out as a “couple” he drank and drank until he was drunk. I didn’t mind. He did it again the second time we dated. I got annoyed. Besides he was selling pot on the bathroom and the owner got pissed and didn’t want to let him in again.

Sunday morning I thought “what the fucks am I doing with that guy? He’s older than me, alcoholic and he smokes often…not good, not good.”

meh. i feel like puking. i’ll finish this thing later

Okay, I wrote that on nov 28 and it’s almost a month after.

…so I decided to tell him it’s over and he’s been calling me ever since very often and sometimes he says he’s another person just to see if I pick up the phone. I hate him. Srsly. I mean, besides the alcohol problems he has, I hated the way he touched me. He hugged me awfully tight, plus he was the worst kisser, and he always had bad breath. ew. Besides, he has this friend and when they go out, they’re always fighting and that pissed me off. Also, Fernando only went out with him cuz he had a car, so he “used” him as a taxi driver which, imo it’s something you should never do …often. So, overall I decided he’s a person I don’t want to ever see again…and he’s the first ex I really really don’t want to know anything about.

That makes me wonder what the fuck am I doing.

and how do I find it?

I asked that to my mother today. I think that happiness doesn’t come from stuff outside, but rather than it comes from the inside…but it must be very deep, cuz I haven’t found it yet. My mom said lotta stuff, but what I can remember:  ”I’m really happy when I eat a taco, or a sope… I feel very happy when I give therapy to people. (…) God is inside every one of us, he’s perfect and that perfection is inside of us too. If you find God inside of you, you’ll find happiness.”

Uhm. I’m asking more people.

 ”Anything that can go wrong will go wrong “ and indeed it happened. On tuesday I went out with Rudy. He called me and said that Gorki had free tickets to the movies. When we arrived to his job, he said he sold the tickets and got drunk with some friends… well. Then they wanted to go and smoke. It kinda pissed me off cuz that’s the only thing they want to do. We went to the plazuela, and we sat in the fountain. Gorki was minding his own buissness talking to a dude and Rudy was just playing guitar. Me? I felt ignored and pissed cuz I wanted to see a movie. Wait, before that we agreed we should rent a DVD cuz I was in a movie-like mood… I even told them they could come over to my house. They didn’t want to at the end, cuz they know they can’t smoke in my house.

Anywayz….I was awfully bored and pissed, when Fernando arrived. I said “hi. God, save me from boredom or it’s going to kill me.” So, we didn’t do anything…we just talked a bit while Rudy and Gorki were I don’t know where. He said he wanted to develop some films, and I walked with him. Whe didn’t take more than 10 mins, yet Rudy sent me two messages saying that we were leaving already.

So, he brought me back to my house. Next day, I wanted to go to the premiere of The Exorcism of Emily Rose on the new cinemas…I invited Mar but she couldn’t go. So then I called Fer, then I called Rudy but I couldn’t find him. I ended up going alone with him and at the end he asked me out. I said, yeah, cuz I like him…but I’m kinda not liking him so much now.

To begin with, he’s 9 years older than me…and I don’t really feel there’s such a big gap between us. I think that’s kinda weird, considering that I act like a 17 year old…Ok, another thing the two nights we were together he was either very drunk or kinda drunk. Today I invited him to my cinematography class and he fell asleep. I mean, I can understand he didn’t sleep the night before and that he didn’t find it too interesting…but I did feel like wtf.

When the police thing happened it was his fault…and still he keeps carrying stuff around and he’s even selling it. I mean, I wouldn’t pay much attention to that if he was only my friend…but he’s my boyfriend now and that’s not cool.

In few words, now that I know him I don’t like him that much. He’s an okay friend, but not boyfriend material. He doesn’t pay attention to his breath when he’s kissing..and I don’t like the way he kisses me. He says he’s not jelous or possesive, but his body language says another thing…or maybe he does it cuz he wants me to feel safe…but I don’t need protection, I can take care of myself.

Gee.

A weird event….that’s actually the reason that named this entry. We started dating wed. Next day I go to work all afternoon. Friday I have school and I didn’t had the chance to talk to Rudy.  Fer and I were at this party and we were kissing. I don’t know if Rudy saw us or not. I think not. Anywayz, it broke my heart when I said hello to him, he said it in such a light-hearted lovely way that I felt like the worse person on earth. I mean, Rudy isn’t perfect yet he always brought me home and paid lotta stuff for me. I mean, that’s a nice gesture…I mean, on essence, he’s a good person. He does stuff that annoys me, but that’s another story….

Oh well, what I hate from Fer is that he asks the same things over and over and that he wants to have a reason for everything…and when I saw Rudy, according to Fer, I un-held his hand…and that he felt it was akward and that it was a mean gesture. Also, when I said hello to Rudy we always kissed on the lips, and I didn’t do it this time…I kissed him in the cheek and he was kinda surprised..and when we hugged, we did for a longer time than usual…

I honestly think that he suspects that we’re dating, but didn’t want to say anything about it…. Like I said, it was a VERY unconfortable moment…Then Fer asked me wtf, and how did I felt….but he pushed me so much to think about it and I started crying….I cried because I didn’t want to hurt Rudy’s feelings, I cried because I wanted to date Rudy and he never really asked me out, I cried cuz being Rudy’s girl represents the past, that person I no longer want to be, the childish, silly Diana…and Fer seemed to me (at that moment) like the person who needs a grown-up girlfriend…but bah.

I’m going to tell Fer that I don’t like what he’s doing…and that I won’t ask him to change because of me…If he wants to chance he has to do it for himself…if he can’t do it, well too bad then. I’ll get myself another boyfriend :/

At the end the proyect came out pretty cool…From Sunday to Thursdays I wish it was Friday already keke. I don’t remeber what I did that week. Oh yeah. Fuck yes I fucking remember what happened. OMFG it was awful. Seriously. Monday Rudy and I went with a friend we call the mic(rophone) and they wanted to smoke pot. So, mic said “oh let’s go to this place near my house called “the texcal” and it’s alone and cool and we can walk around” So I thought, yeah that’s cool, let’s go. When we got there, we had to jump the fence cuz it was closed, but suddenly I saw the lights of a car flashing on some far away trees. I got scared and we hid on the bushes…the car passed and it was ok. I felt spiderwebs all over my face and arms, but it wasn’t bad…but when I stood up, oh my fucking GOOOOD!!!! there was a gigant tarantula walking on my chest!! creepy. I made a fast movement with my hand to maker her fall…I was kinda freaked out, but we continued walking…in less than five minutes we saw another van coming towards us, but we couldn’t hide this time cuz the road was straight and they could see us from far far away. So it would look far more suspicious if we suddenly ran and hid than if we continued like nothing happened. It was the forest police and they told us to be supercareful cuz there werecrazy drunken indian mexicans that killed people and such around…we said, “ok thanx, bye” I thought “uhm…there’s lotta car activity here, we should better go. Bah, I’m going to sound like a little scared girl if i tell the guys i want to leave..” I was thinking of how to tell them I wanted to leave without sounding to cowardly or something, when suddenly, I see this big van with the lights of. Fuck. State police. They turned the big lights towards us and told us to go closer. Fuck fuckety fuckfuckfuck. I imagined the worse. I knew that if they found anything illegal in their pockets, even tho I don’t have anything, I’d go to jail with them JUST CUZ I WAS THERE TOO. They asked me, show him what’s in your pockets. Nothing. Then can i check your purse? Sure, I said. I showed them my gum, my wallet, but I noticed I was shaking. I was sooo scared. Then they checked Rudy, he had a fairly big package with him. Tho, for some reason, they didn’t find anything on him. They told us to move to another spot and wait. They found the pipe mic was smoking. They said they had to take us all three, and blah blah.

At this time, I was picturing myself in tomorrow’s local newspaper “three drugaddicts found in the Texcal at 20h00″ with the picture of us three there. I thought, fuckfuckfuck, I’m not going to make it to tomorrow’s concert! I had just bought a ticket for Apocalyptica…Anywayz, god bless mexico and we gave the policemen 100 pesos and they let us go. *whew* Rudy later on told me he hid it on his balls ew.

Anywayz, next day I went to the concert by myself. It was pretty cool. When I got to the busplace, I found Axel’s ex-g/f , Ada. We talked a bit on the road but then I fell asleep. Intersting convo, huh? lol. Anywayz, I’ve never seen them live, it was pretty cool they’re crazy They lifted the cellos and played on diffrent parts of the scenario and I loved the way the played the songs. The only bad thing is that I had to sit all the time…cuz the place was a theatre and people weren’t allowed to jump or stand up…it was nice still. Outside, i bought a t-shirt and a metal termic cup. I met a guy who told me he could give me a ticket signed by trent reznor! Yay! Too bad I lost his address..

Next interesting thing happened on Friday. We had this proffessor called Ezzio Avedaños. He seemed a little bit dumb and nervous. At the end I noticed he wasn’t like that. He’s a bit hysterical, dark, serious and stressed.  He gave us class two weekends. He came with a photographer called Hector Mashi..something Mitsuko? ¬_¬ I don’t remember…but he was too shy and quiet…or at least seemed like that.

I spent a nice time with him talking about movies and some other stuff, he went out with us after class to drink beer and go to parties. We filmed something else under his supervision. I hated that filming too cuz I didn’t do almost anything.

I was kicked out of my past group, (Mar was kicked out too) and we didn’t wanted to be with the other group, so we decided to make another one. Yet, people that were supposed to be in it, never showed up….or did too late. So we didn’t made the group and I didn’t participate. All jobs were full.

I got early to school, and one of the main actors wasn’t there, so, Karla the director told me “yah, you’ll act” but I had to come back to my house to get another pair of jeans cuz the one i had slides down when I ran..(the guy i was playing, ran almost all the time) when I came back the guy wasn’t there yet, but she told me “forget it, he’s arriving in 20 mins, you’re not playing that part” I was like WTF you BITCH! So I slept most of the time while the filming happened, cuz she was so un-organized people were yelling and arguing most of the time and nothing was getting doen. It SUCKED. Anywayz, we editted the sequence this weekend and I worked like 3 hours on it and I learned how to use Final Cut Pro and I was satisfied.

This weekend was ok, I didn’t do anything but I didn’t care to do anything anywayz. Past weekend sucked, cuz my mom didn’t let me go out cuz my room was messy. Same thing happened this weekend, but like i said, this time i didn’t cared.

*whew* this is a long post. I’m going to go with Gerardo tomorrow and prolly I’ll have more interesting things to say.

oh, talking about interesting. I noticed, i FINALLY GOT OVER EDO. Jesus Christ. It took me 5 months…well, we “dated” for over a year, but we were together just one month… yet it’s the most significant relationship I’ve ever had…but..uh. w/e. I even asked him to give me my necklace back…that’s an important step…cuz that means I know we’re absolutely done with eachother. But mostly, I noticed cuz when I went back to The Prophecy and his blog and saw pics and the video I have, i didn’t felt nostalgic or anything. It was like looking at any other picture of my life. He emailed me back, for the first time since we broke up, but I wasn’t excited about it. I knew the past times I emailed him, he wasn’t going to answer yet, I also knew he had to answer this time. He says he’s enjoying life, I really hope he is.

I was thinking that I should try to enter CCC this next school year, or the CUEC…or try Belgium again. I don’t know what the fucks should I do with my lifes. I’m confused, again. But this time, at least i’m attending this cinematography course and I’m loving every second of it. There’s always something shitty on stuff, and this time is the unorganized group we have, but oh well. It can’t be always perfect.

Estuvo bien chido este fin de semana. Los que vienen van a ser asi tambien. I really want to write in spanish, but I’d like to share this with everyone, I met this guy called Gustavo Montiel, and he’s a waesome film director and scriptwriter. We had a class with him, actually, two ..a total of 12 hours and we watched movies, but not the whole movie unfortunately, cuz we don’t have that much time. We saw most of the time like 30 or 20 minutes of it. I finally, after an hour and a half got a bit relaxed. I smoked like 10 cigarettes and I drank like 3 beers, and I got too much sugar and listened to psycho music…So when I got home I felt like if I was high. I drank more coffee (after drinking half I thought it would had been better if I didn’t drank it, but it was too late! keke!) Anywayz, I had classes with Gustavo Montiel…wait I already said that. Ok, so it was cool. I went out with Rudy last night and we went to this creepy forest that’s in the middle of the old road to
Mexico City, we tried to find a cementary, but he couldn’t remember the path. Which was good. keke. I was too afraid…but then I was relaxed, cuz we just sat down in a tree and we could see the lights of the city and the stars, and we felt the light rain and it was a cool moment. We didn’t had sex or anything, tho he kinda wanted the other day…well, not kinda, he wanted, I’m almost sure… I wanted to…but I said no, cuz I don’t want him to think I’m a slut or something. I don’t know, I don’t think it’s so bad to have sex with the people you like, but lieeek society doesn’t see it that way…and there’s so many things I don’t care what society says, but iono. I just… I don’t know. Later. Anywayz, I saw Eliel and Marifer (Sid’s ex-g/f) she’s really funny We saw this other girl, that I think Laura hates called Julieta…she says she reads tarot and she can tell your future by looking at your hand. She did tell me some stuff that was happening in my life. Not too impressive, but ok. Anywayz, what about her? oh yea, she’s kinda…fake or something. The thing is that Mar doesn’t like her at all, and she casted some “grr, you stupid bitch” looks, and it was hella funny :p cuz I noticed and laughed everytime she did, but the guys around us, didn’t even knew WTF was happening between us… I also told her “enrollate y vete guey!” that’s something like “curl in and leave” or something, you know like, when snakes curl and then leave..uh. iono it’s really funny in Spanish KEKE. I also saw this guy who’s friend of Axel, and he didn’t recognize me, but I said hi to him anywayz. He’s funny. I also met some others today and it was cool. I had a very nice time..Tomorrow I’ll go to work…well, today, Sunday.lol.  I just have to go and help organize some event made by some company to promote Disney and National Geographic products. They’re books and stuff, for kids… and just for assisting and helping out a bit, I’ll get paid 120 pesos, that’s like 10 usd…which isn’t bad. Considering that ppl get 80 per day (8 hours of work) and I’ll work only like 5 or 6 hours… Plus, if I go to the meetings all month long (they’re made only on Sundays) I’ll get a bonus ooh, and most important, if I sell Disney or National Geographic material, I’ll get some percentage too…:D I’m happy and I’m relaxed…finally. I wanted to go with Rudy and Eliel and everyone to a place called Rush or something, I’ve never been there, I wanted to go.. but w/e I have to sleep a bit…I haven’t slept a lot these days. night!